


Hotel in NYC

by triggermoreliketiger



Category: Thomas Sanders
Genre: Angst, M/M, Other, Platonic Love, Sad Ending, a little bit of fluffy, and you're probably gonna cry a little bit, be ready to get your heart broken, honestly I forgot to put it here, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-26 00:44:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13846488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triggermoreliketiger/pseuds/triggermoreliketiger
Summary: Roman wants to finally get along with LoganInspired with the amazing song by Fall Out Boy Twin Skeleton’s.





	Hotel in NYC

**Author's Note:**

> TW; Major Character's Death, mentions of mental insitute

_“There's a room in a hotel in New York City_  
  That shares our fate and deserves our pity”  


_Roman anxiously crossed the street keeping his eyes fixed on the man walking in front of him. Everything about this man was familiar. His bronze hair, his grey scarf, the way he walked, the way he moved. Everything was familiar about this man._

* * *

 

_This man was Logan Sanders. Roman’s brother. The one he hadn’t seen in 6 years. His greatest enemy or whatever._

_When Roman saw Logan on the streets of New York, so lost, with his glasses completely fogged, he just couldn’t… leave it. But he also couldn’t bring himself to come closer and casually punch him in the shoulder asking what’s up. So Roman did exactly what every Broadway star would do in this situation- he put on his shades, shoved hands into  pockets of his stylish coat and followed his poor, innocent brother. Actually they weren’t even related with blood. It was simply because Roman’s father remarried with Logan’s parent._

_Roman knew that Logan was going to visit New York. Every newspaper was writing about that. The famous doctor Sanders confirms his attendance on World wide’s Astronomy Conference in New York. 6 years ago… Roman would be jealous. 6 years ago his parents would only talk about that completely forgetting about Roman’s new show or Broadway debut. But Roman had grown up since he left home. The jealousy turned into longing. The anger turned into pride. The bitter feeling down his stomach turned into something mushy that Roman didn’t know how to handle._

_Roman stopped and hid himself behind the newspaper stall upon seeing that Logan slows down the pace to finally stop in front of the tall building. Hotel. Of course. One of the fancy ones. Because Logan was smart enough to be a professor and still make some money. Also one of the advantages of being the favorite child of two strict mathematicians.  Roman had always been the one with head in the clouds, the one who chased after the foggy dreams. The one that was never encouraged to proceed on his theater career, to the point he had to move out because of the nasty remarks._

_Should Roman follow Logan inside? No, that would just be weird. Roman sighed and leaned his head against the cold brick wall. Did Logan even want him back in his perfect life? Did he want Roman The Major Mess back? They always hated each other. Argued a lot. Not a single insult was left without a passionate verbal fightback. Roman had to face facts- only because he missed Logan didn’t mean that Logan missed him. He took off his shades and put them into the inner pocket of his long, beige coat. The back of his head rested on the wall again and he let his eyes fall down._

_All he wanted was to apologize. All he wanted was to try to make things better. All he wanted was catch up, try to finally have a brother he used to push away so fiercely. But was it possible? Could he in one day make up for the mistakes made through the years?_

_Someone in front of Roman loudly cleared out their throat and Roman snap opened his eyes, afraid that it’s some sketchy man. His eyes widen upon seeing slim male with big, grey eyes, hidden behind thick glasses. His face was decorated with slight blush. Roman looked down at Logan’s hand which was holding big thermos cup._

_Logan rubbed his arm awkwardly as Roman still shocked took over the cup. Only then he noticed that Logan didn’t have a coat put on. Only grey scarf loosely hanging around his neck. Did he go outside only to give this to Roman? Did he…?_

_“How did you know I was here?” asked Roman tilting his head and wrapping his hands tighter around the cup. It was pleasantly warm but Roman didn’t dare to open it yet._

_Logan smirked lightly giving Roman the “duh” look, that the other seen so many times before. Only that now it lacked the firey anger and heated hatred that Roman was used to._

_“Do you think I’m dumb?” asked Logan shifting his body weight on the other leg._

_“No.” Roman shook his head abruptly. He had always admired Logan for intelligence. He just never had guts to admit it._

_“I think you mean not anymore.” Logan was still smirking but Roman didn’t see anything funny in that. He was ashamed but he knew he should be feeling like that. He used to call Logan all types of stupid in the past._

_“I’m sorry, I…” started Roman a little bit sloppy. Sure he had been planning on apologizing to Logan for quite a while now but in situation when he actually had a chance to do it… he just couldn’t find the right words._

_Logan only waved his hand._

_“It’s not important now. What’s important is that I’m turning into ice cube and in relation to that I shall be going back to my hotel room.” Declared Logan, shivering. He turned back to Roman and started walking in the direction of the hotel._

_Roman bit his lips awkwardly. That was it? That was all? That was the farewell? What about the cup? What about the-_

_“Are you coming Ro or not?” shouted Logan and Roman, standing in front of the front door. Wide smile spread across Roman’s face upon hearing the familiar nickname._

_“I’m coming, I’m coming. Keep the door opened for me!” he yelled back and rushed to Logan._

_“Pff… You wish…” mumbled Logan before making sure that sure the door closed right in front of Roman’s face. He grinned at his brother shocked face before gesturing him to go inside._

_\---_

_Roman couldn’t recall the last time he laughed so many times during one evening. Logan! Was! So Fun! He definitely was a little bit more outgoing and less serious than few years ago, providing Roman all juicy rumors about the neighbors Roman used to know. Roman from the other hand literally broke Logan with the story about losing his own pants during The Heathers. On the stage. In front of the audience. Logan was laughing so hard that he had to take off his glasses and actually use tissues to wipe off the tears gathering in the corners of his eyes._

_The sun had already disappeared behind the horizon and Roman knew that he had to run away soon, like a Cinderella. He hoped that after this meeting Logan would be eager to meet with Roman again and yet… there was still an issue that was bothering him. Some stuff was still unsolved and silent between them. And he had to clear this up today. He would regret forever if he didn’t (or at least until they meet again). Roman cleared his throat, playing with the strip of the tea bag which was soaking in his cup._

_“Hey Logan…” Roman started awkwardly as soon as Logan came back from the bathroom “There’s a thing I wanted to talk about with you…” he shifted uncomfortably on his spot. Suddenly the mattress  was too soft and the cup in his hand too hot. Roman got up and put the tea aside._

_“I’m all ears, Ro.” Said Logan softly leaning against the wall. The warm, yellow light was reflecting in his glasses making his face look even more stoic and unreadable. Roman rubbed the back of his neck._

_“I just don’t know how to start…” huffed out Roman finally, walking small circles around the room. Logan’s slim fingers quickly grabbed Roman’s wrist. The glasses slid down his nose and Roman could see his own reflection. His troubled face and runny eyes._

_“Roman, calm down. I think I have a taint of suspicion what you want to talk about but it can wait.” He pulled Roman closer and awkwardly hugged him. His muscles were tense. They had never hugged before. Roman a little bit stiffly wrapped his arms around Logan. “First of all you need to relax, Ro. Breathe…”_

_Roman closed his eyes and tried to focus on his breath. He knew all the exercises. He had been an actor for quite a while now but he got same anxious before every show. Yet this time was different. It wasn’t a show. Logan was a real person. And these were Roman’s true emotions. He tried to follow Logan’s pattern of breathing, until he calmed down a little bit. He gently patted Logan’s shoulder, letting him now that he can let go off him. They parted, both a little bit embarrassed. Roman coughed._

_“It feels like we’ve been setting new boundaries after all these years…” He sat back on the couch while Logan rested on the arm holder._

_“It’s high time to start re-setting them, don’t you think?” asked Logan quietly and Roman looked in his direction. His brother wasn’t looking at him at all, staring into the nothingness, probably thinking about the past.  Their past._

_Roman took a deep breath._

_“I was a royal jerk to you, Logan. And for that and many other things I’m sorry.” He let his eyelids fall down as he continued his little speech “I’m sorry I pushed you away when you wanted to get closer to me. I’m sorry I pretend that I didn’t know you at school. I’m sorry I punched you in a face… more than once.” Roman heard a quietly chuckle coming from Logan but kept his eyes closed “I’m sorry that I threw your little solar system into the lake. I’m sorry I drew dicks all over your books. I’m sorry I… I’m sorry I hated you. And showed that. I was wrong.” Roman opened his eyes and looked back at Logan “I shouldn’t have done any of that. You’re a cool guy and I… I’m glad we are after all a family…” gulp “…Lolo.”_

_Logan’s face lightened up. Lolo. But this time this nickname didn’t have this teasing undertone, it didn’t finish with Lolo the Nerd or Nerdolo. It was just Lolo. The name he introduced himself with all these years ago when both of them were children. Logan felt that his eyes were slowly filling with hot tears. He sobbed soundlessly still smiling._

_“It’s nice to hear you finally say that this way…” said Logan, surprised with the fact how hard words were coming out of his mouth. Something was blocking his throat and he needed a few seconds to realize that these were old, muffled emotions. “I w-wasn’t the best type of person myself.” Logan took a deep breath feeling Roman’s eyes on his own face “I’m sorry for talking bad things about you behind your back. I’m sorry for stealing Mrs. Fluffybottom so many times. I’m sorry for destroying your posters by putting physics formulas on it. I’m sorry for never standing by your side when parents were scolding you off for following your dreams… I’m sorry for being… How do I put this… I’m sorry for being an asshole?” he winked to Roman at the end. It came with a lot of effort but it was worth it. He didn’t know what kind of reaction to expect. Mere seconds later he was swept off his feet in a bone-crushing hug._

_Roman smelled like dust, old wooden stage and instant tea. He smelt like someone close. He smelt like home that was long gone and part of family that was never there._

_“Put me down Ro! I can’t breathe.” Laughed Logan quietly, trying to push Roman away. He felt as if this one simple hug made him few years younger. Roman was grinning at him widely and Logan smiled back. His smile was coy and a little bit lost but genuine and that what mattered. They were standing in front of each other, smiling. Roman, taller and more muscular, with hands on his hips, was proudly grinning at Logan, showing off his perfectly white teeth. Logan, a little bit embarrassed and confused, was looking up at Roman, letting his lips curl up in a smile. It was like they were letting their bond, tie them together again. This time it wasn’t toxic and dark, its strings weren’t soaking with insult and lies. It was one of the purest bonds that can appear between two people. Bond which lights up the darkness and paints smiles on sad faces. Love._

_Logan was the first one to move._

_“You should go home Ro. It’s getting late and I don’t want you to run into some sketchy guy.”_

_Roman laughed loudly._

_“Some could say that you’re the New Yorker here, not me.” He gently patted Logan’s shoulder causing the latter to stumble a little bit. Roman was really strong and Logan was really tired. “But okay I will give you some rest.” He came over the door. “But we’re like… we’re in touch?” his hand was gripping the handle tightly as if he wasn’t sure what the answer would be._

_Logan snorted._

_“Of course we keep in touch, big guy.” He was almost sure that after that Roman would just leave but he once again was caught off guard, finding himself trapped in Roman’s hug again._

_“I’m glad I followed you today.” Said Roman quietly to Logan’s ear “I’m glad we could finally… talk it through…” he moved away “I’m glad we’re finally good. Lolo.”_

_His face looked more peaceful than ever and Logan couldn’t help but smile. Roman in many terms hadn’t changed at all during all these years they spent separated._

_“Yeah… Me too.”_

_Roman smiled again and happily patted Logan’s back._

_Logan didn’t expect that coming._

_He stumbled on his own feet and the floor started moving irrationally close to him._

_He hit something. Badly.  His head was pounding and everything was black._

_The last thing he heard was Roman screaming something about staying with him._

_The last thing that crossed his mind was if he could ever go see one of Roman’s show._

\---

“…Mister Sanders? Mister Sanders!”

Roman snapped out of his thoughts. Logan’s smiling face disappeared in the depths of his mind again. A sob rolled through his body.

“Y-yes?” he asked quietly, his eyes still fixed into fingers. Full of hate and disgust eyes were burning holes in his back.

“Mister Sanders, do you still claim to be innocent of these charges?” the judge’s voice rolled through the court.

“What charges?” Roman couldn’t recognize his voice.

Judge cleared her throat.

“Of intentional causing death of your step-brother Logan Sanders, Mister Sanders.”

Roman knew that if he would lie the verdict would be less harsh. But he couldn’t. Because he was innocent.

“I didn’t kill him.” His lips moved but no sound came out.

“Louder mister Sanders.”

“I didn’t kill him! It was accident!” Roman yelled loudly, finally raising up his head. The tears were rolling down his face, blurring his sight. But he knew well enough what was happening in front of him.

“If I may remind Your Honour “ The voice was rough and aggressive, Roman didn’t like it at all “in 2015 The Accused in the interview for magazine  _The Stage_  said, this is a quote, “I could kill my own brother and act the role of an innocent person. I bet you would all believe me.” End of the quote, for me this is clear that even back then mister Sanders was planning the homicide!”

 _“Falsehood!”_ screamed Logan in Roman’s head and the man smiled to himself. At least he wasn’t alone in this mess.

“As I explained before Your Honour…” it was time for Roman’s lawyer to speak “My client has a mental disorder confirmed by doctor, you have all the files Your Honour. Hoever it is still unclear if the madness developed before or after the crime, I think it’s worth to take this and the family’s background into the consideration too.”

“It was all-way-through planned homicide!” opposed the Aggressive Voice “The accused, Roman Sanders, was following his brother’s career and found out that he’s going to be in New York! Then he followed him to the hotel, under some mere pretext of apologizing got into the victim’s room where he with cold blood, murdered the deceased Logan Sanders! The facts are all here Your Honour!”

\---

Roman blinked watching the judge walking into the room.

“Roman Sanders, you are found guilty of committing a crime of homicide, conducted on your step-brother Logan Sanders. However the court took under consideration your mental disorder and decided to put you inside the mental institution.”

The empty sound of the hammer banging against the wood filled the room.

Roman closed his eyes trying to feel Logan’s spirit.

It was all an accident.

_Fin._


End file.
